Wonderful Wednesday 8-31-16

The past few days have been filled with all sorts of good things! Haha, I literally just wrote that sentence and my toddler woke for the day! Be back later… #momlife, right?

Alright, I am back! Gracie is eating “cake” (a banana muffin – recipe from my SIL Maria! I will post it later!) and drinking some water (she doesn’t like milk and I am out of her “muck” (yogurt smoothie drinks). There is always something to celebrate, but the past few days have just made me smile!

1)Last Thursday, three friends and I got together for a mom/newborn brunch! It made my heart happy. There are no pictures because we were too busy encouraging one another. My friends Jill (mom to Mia, born the same day as Ben), Barbie (mom to Colt, born in August), and Lauren (mom to Charlotte “Charlie”, born the day after Colt) all gathered with some of our big kids who weren’t in school/daycare for some breakfast and fellowship. We wish my good friend Stacy (mom to Layton born in June) could have been there, but her maternity leave is already over and she had to work. Boo. If you don’t already, you should follow Lauren (my favorite cousin’s wife) at http://www.bittybunching.com/, where she writes honestly about being a mom of two under two!

I loved our interaction not only because there was yummy food (Jill made a knock-out egg strata that I may or may not have tried to secretly keep the leftovers in my fridge!!), but because we were all there helping each other with advice, encouragement, or hands-on baby help. Benjamin and Charlie were the loudest two babies, while Mia and Colt slept peacefully almost the whole time. So, Jill and Barbie helped me snuggle Ben or get Gracie some food. I loved it. It didn’t matter if we were formula feeding or breast feeding, pro/anti-vaccine/organic food/co-sleeping/if our car seat buckles were in the exact right place across the nipple line/if we were pro/anti-screen time as a method to increase mama sanity/used the right kind of suncreen/etc. We were just MOMS being with MOMS and their KIDS and it was beautiful. I can’t wait until we can get together again and commiserate on sleep deprivation, reflux issues, and the craziness of having more than one little person AND a newborn.

2) Family outings. A couple of days ago, Matt came home early from work and we packed the kids and our yellow lab Zoe in the car, made a quick stop at Miller’s Meats to get some amazing chicken for dinner, and headed to Codorus State Park in PA. We have a spot we like to go to that is generally away from crowds where we can take Zoe swimming in the lake and then eat a picnic dinner. It isn’t far from the bathrooms or parking lot, but far enough away from civilization, that it seems like we have our own private beach. The weather was perfect: hot, but not too hot, with a slight breeze coming off the water. Zoe loved swimming and earning treats, the girls enjoyed the water with Daddy, and Ben and I had a lot of good snuggle time in the beauty of the outdoors. The worst part was changing Gracie’s poopy swim diaper. The worst. The best part was ending our summer with some happy, relaxing family memories. We even came home and had a bonfire and Ellie and Matt camped out in the backyard in a tent! If you follow me on Facebook, you saw our picture collage from the day already.

3) Hair Therapy afternoon! Well, really, ANY form of self-care (relaxing bath, binge-watching “Heartland” on Netflix with a glass of wine-ahem-, a walk on a nature trail, etc) is good and important. But for me, yesterday, I got to get my hair done! I made sure the kids were good: Ellie dressed in her gymnastics leotard so we could leave right away after I got home, milk thawing for Benjamin (because I “surprisingly” did not plan enough time to sit and pump before I left), lunches made for the kids, and cash in my wallet for tips (you can’t put tips on your CC where I go). My mom (aka “Mimi”) is retired now, but still has been super busy. I worked out an afternoon when she was free to come stay with the kids and I was off to the salon! It is so magical to have time to yourself getting pampered: that glorious shampoo head massage, styling miracles, adult conversation…so nice! Here is the transformation! Thanks for your encouragement on Facebook when I posted there yesterday!

4) Mom autonomy. This could be a whole post in and of itself (and maybe it will be one day), but I have decided to tap into my autonomous self and not succumb any longer (or try not to anyway!!) to the dreaded…MOM GUILT. Actually, who am I kidding? MOM GUILT is hard to destroy. All of those things I mentioned earlier that WEREN’T mentioned at our new mama brunch (bf/formula, sleeping arrangements, organic foods, etc) are different ways we mamas do our mama stuff (some by choice and some by necessity). Often, even after making a decision, mamas are left with doubt and the yucky MOM GUILT.

Benjamin is child #3 for us and I consider myself a “good mom” who loves her kids! I am FAR FROM PERFECT (am not always present with my kids, speak out of anger at Ellie sometimes, pick battles I shouldn’t or don’t pick battles I should, etc), but I generally act based of thoughtful decisions. Generally. Matt would say I am impulsive when it comes to rearranging furniture or some other grand schemes…but I digress… Anyway, Ben is similar to Gracie (our now 22-month old) in that he prefers….(Shhh….this is big…)…belly sleeping. There, I said it. We have a belly sleeper, folks! Alert the mom police.

With Gracie, I was so focused on surviving a newborn and a threenager, that I didn’t think much of our decision to put her on her belly when she transitioned to a crib. We were just happy we were all sleeping…sometimes. But, with Benjamin, it is different! I don’t know if it is that I have so many friends with newborns or spend more time reading online articles (ugh–sometimes I hate how accessible online opinions are! I get way too wrapped up in reading comments), but for this sweet baby, I have guilt for letting Benjamin sleep on his tummy. We waited until he had good neck control and could turn his head from side to side and then made our big move from the Rock-N-Play (where he slept on his back or side) to his crib. And, when we made the move, he started sleeping more. He even slept EIGHT hours the other night. Sometimes, it is just five, but five hours is WAY MORE than two. He is happier and we are happier. Scratch that. Mama is more sane. Not that you make huge decisions based of happiness, but c’mon, happiness does tend to influence our choices.

Last night, I succumbed to MOM GUILT and read lots of info on SIDS and I decided I was going to force Benjamin to be a back sleeper because after all, BACK IS BEST. Well, we failed. I tried FOUR TIMES to get him to settle on his back (FOUR TIMES amidst feedings and snuggles) and he startled himself awake each time. I finally just flipped him, he moved his head from side to side and found his own comfy position and then he slept for a few hours…I didn’t sleep, of course, but spent about another hour reading all sorts of things about belly sleepers. I won’t start a debate here, but it sure is interesting reading all the perks of both ways. It is also interesting (and that is putting it mildly) just how often we as a society make decisions based off popular government mandates or fear. I survived the 80’s riding around in the back of my dad’s 1979 Chevy pickup truck or laying down on the floor of any of our vehicles not belted on long trips to upstate NY. Of course, as my friend Jill says, we weren’t involved in wrecks. But, I just hate how we (me included) are so afraid to do anything anymore. As long as I am making a good choice for my child, I shouldn’t have to feel ashamed.

Here is my beautiful belly-sleeping boy last night:

Ahh…the preciousness of a sleeping baby!

Oh! I almost forgot, I have decided to not limit my #celebrate posts to Wednesdays. If I feel like sharing my celebration posts on a different day, I will! I may have Marvelous Mondays, Terrific Tuesdays, Fabulous Fridays, or other cliche days you can enjoy! If I feel like writing a non-celebratory post on a Wednesday, I will! I am so excited about this Back to School/fall season and have lots of ideas swarming around in my head that I can’t wait to pen. Let me know what you want to discuss as well!

Thank you for your support in this journey called Motherhood! What are YOU celebrating today?

~Julie

Wonderful Wednesday on a Thursday (8-25-16)

Wow! I have been off all week long! If you follow me on Facebook, you probably saw my “Merry Monday and Happy New Week” post appear on a Tuesday. And not just a Tuesday, but a Tuesday night at that! It wasn’t until yesterday (Wednesday), that I realized the previous day was not Monday. Oops. At least you may feel a little more pity for me in my sleep-deprived state (which is getting better, btw!). So, without further adieu, here are a few things I am celebrating:

1. Tea Parties – Not just tea parties, really, but any time my kids PLAY, I mean really play. I LOVE seeing them use their imaginations. Sometimes, I have to convince Ellie she isn’t “bored” and there are tons of toys available to her! It is also really neat to see the girls play more and more TOGETHER! Win-win!
2. 

   

   Tea Party Time!

   

   My new planner! It is fresh and glittery! It has sparkly month tabs and stickers! I even opened a new pack of fine point markers to use in it! I love that it spans 18 months! Woot! This new year (the school year is always my new year!), I would love to fill some spaces with dates with my hubby and fun outings with the kids! 

    

3. My Facebook Friends. Seriously! You know who you are! I may not see you in person, but you encourage me! Yesterday, baby boy was having a tough day, Mama’s expectations were WAY too high (I wanted to set up an office for my husband while nursing a cranky newborn and keeping a toddler and a 5-year old occupied…ahem…a little too much), and I threw myself a little pity party right then and there on the couch. But, you didn’t let me stay there! Nope. You encouraged me by reminding me to cherish these moments because they are passing way too quickly. Thank you to my grad school friend Katrina for telling me: “I just tell myself that the to-do list will always be there. But these babies grow so fast and one day they won’t need me anymore and my house will be spotless but my arms will be empty 😭 so enjoy the snuggles.” My heart needed that encouragement and my mind needed that reminder.
4. Family walks. This one is HUGE for me. My husband has worked late for the seven years we have been married. He is rarely home for dinner and the getting-ready-for-bedtime circus act of baths, teeth, and pjs, etc. (Praise God he is usually home for bedtime, or you might find me passed out on the floor each night after some of our days). So, I was so excited when he got home after dinner, but early enough for some family time yesterday! He suggested going on a walk! Woot! Mama needs to work off this baby weight, but what was even better, was BEING TOGETHER. We even talked to some sweet neighbors we haven’t seen in awhile and stopped by to visit some of our favorite neighbors to have them meet Benjamin. These neighbors, Brian, Julie, and girls, are AWESOME! They are so welcoming, regardless of the time or day! They even like our dog. What’s even better, is Brian is an amazing chef and sent us home with homemade pepper jam and canned peppers from his garden. Mmmm. Yay for talking face-to-face in lieu of texting. Yay for family walks and seeing the beauty of God’s creation. All the grumpiness I had earlier in the day literally melted away! ps. Feel free to give Matt a hard time about his missing tooth! It is on his list to fix soon, hopefully! 😉
5. Baby cheeks. Oh man, do I LOVE smooshing this sweet boy with my kisses. There is just something ahh-mazing about baby cheeks. I just love this boy!!!

So, there you go!! There is always something to celebrate! Tell me what you are celebrating today, this Wonderful (day after) Wednesday!

~Julie

Wonderful Wednesday? 8-17-16

It’s that time again–Wonderful Wednesday–the day I have set aside each week to share what I am celebrating. I shared in a previous post how CELEBRATE was my focus word for the year. Each week, I have been able to fairly rapidly share JOYS or things I LOVE.

Well, you know what? Today, it is hard to spill those out. Today was a hard day. Yesterday was a hard day, too. I can’t honestly remember the day before that. This week has just been hard. My inlaws lost their dog, Mandi, who they loved as a child for 19 years. That is hard stuff. My heart breaks for them. What a hole left in their lives and hearts…I read about the terrible flooding and destruction in LA and see pictures of lives changed or destroyed forever and my heart aches…a woman from church lost her step son and I ache again…and the list goes on…

The week is only half over, but I am tired. There has just been a lot of: spilled dark chocolate almond milk, whines, never-ending energy in child #1, baby crying, nursing fatigue, dirty dishes, toy disasters, little blank ants crawling everywhere, Goldfish crumbs, unfolded laundry, garden weeds, unmet expectations, and more fatigue. Today, I felt like a ping pong ball going from one thing to the next and barely accomplishing anything. I am not sure why some days are harder than others, but wow…I laughed when I remember it was Wonderful Wednesday today.

The past few days, I have held to the “Fake it ‘Til You Make It” motto. I felt like giving up and giving in, but just kept pressing forward, sort of faking it..and we are making it! Monday, we were going stir crazy and everything seemed liked it was spiraling out of control. But, somehow we were able to get out of the house, go through the CFA drive-thru for lunch and have a picnic in the shade at a local park. And you know what? We did feel better. So, without further adieu, my list of things to celebrate shall begin!

#1 We got out of the house and had a picnic Monday! (You can just see part of Benjamin in my Baby K’tan in this pic). I also got to go grocery shopping ALONE at 7:30 yesterday morning…pure delight! Here I am with my much-needed cup of Furnace Hills Coffee. Ahhh…

#2 My Encouragers. Thank you, encouragers for listening, loving, hugging me when I need a hug, sending me hilarious bitmojis, giving me an uplifting word, doing what needs to be done,…being my village. You, my family and friends, are my TRIBE. You are how I will walk steadily through this part of my journey, instead of limp or lay down in retreat. Thank you.

#3 Baby smiles. I’ve mentioned this before on here, but Benjamin’s smiles at his mama MELT MY HEART. One of these days, I will capture one fully on film, but for now, I have captured them in my heart.

#4 Jesus Loves Me. I sing this song to Gracie every night before bed as I am rocking her in our normal routine post two books (normally “Old McDonald” and a “Little Blue Truck” book) and prayers. Tonight, as I wearily rocked her, I looked up and saw the sign in Benjamin’s nursery that reads “You are Loved.” I put it there for Benjamin, but tonight, God had that message for me. “You are loved, Julie. Yes, you are tired, but I am your strength. I am always here and love you.” Thank you, God, for reminding me of Your great love and reminding me that I am never alone. Zephaniah 3:17 says,“For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love, He will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.” That’s a lot to celebrate.

#5 Peace Lily. My good friend from college, Christian, gave my sister and I each a peace lily back in 2001 for my birthday. My birthday (and my twin sister’s) is September 12th. That year, we received the lilies four days prior to our birthday, but three days prior to 9-11. A gift of peace right before a time of terror. Rarely, the lily will bloom, but it recently bloomed FOR ME. The beautiful white flower reminds me every time of the tragedy of 9-11, but also reminds me of the peace that God gives. He tells us in John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”

So, there you have it, friends. My reasons to celebrate! What are yours?

~Julie

 

 

 

 

Never Alone

It seems like we are in a Baby Season right now! As you know, I just had a baby boy. Several friends have had babies recently. My cousin and his wife had their sweet pea yesterday. For everyone, the new babies are second or third children. And with the new sweet additions, there are new and different challenges than with having a first born. The sibling adjustment can be smooth or it can come with challenges.

For us, going from one to two children was H A R D. I think it had a lot to do with #1 being a strong-willed threenager when we added #2. Couple that with starting preschool two days a week that produced even more anxiety in #1, we had a recipe for disaster.

Going from two to three has been relatively smooth. The fact that I am blogging BY MYSELF on vacation currently while #3 (only five weeks old) is sleeping peacefully and #s 1 and 2 are happily playing on the beach with Daddy speaks volumes. We didn’t even THINK about vacations or peace (well, maybe we dreamt of them) when #1 and #2 were born. There was too much chaos.

When Benjamin was born, Ellie was nine days shy of turning five and Gracie was about two weeks shy of 21 months. Very different than 3 years 3 months and a newborn! Plus, the personality differences are drastically different at this time! Ellie is still a spitfire, but she has a lot more reason and understanding at five than she did at three. She is more mature and “reigned in” comparatively. Gracie is a pretty happy-go-lucky kid and isn’t even two yet, so the impact isn’t as drastic. Plus, she wasn’t an only child for 3+ years like her big sis was.

Here are my cute kiddos this morning:

The transition for us from one to two was so hard and life-changing, I routinely asked for prayer and sought the advice from mama friends. The article below was originally posted in the January 2015 MOPS newsletter. I wrote it to share our story and hopefully encourage other moms. I hope it encourages you.

“Mama, I want YOOOOOOUUUUUuuuu….” my three-year old Elliana “Ellie” exclaimed. It was bedtime again….the time I used to get a few minutes of freedom after my husband Matt came home from working a long day at the body shop he owns. Now, lately, she has only wanted

me. Every.Second.of.the.Day. It is exhausting. On top of that, I have a newborn attached to my breast at various intervals throughout the day and night. Even when I sneak off to the bathroom, I hear a “Mama, watch me!” as Ellie performs an original song and dance. Then, our 73-lb. overweight, but adorable, lab Zoe comes in for the show, too. I am never alone.

Lately, I have felt like I was a nearly dry sponge, with all the wet and drippy life squeezed out of me. Prior to the arrival of our sweet baby, Grace Evelynn, in October, Ellie started reacting negatively–throwing enormous fits, slamming doors, locking herself in her room, answering back with the disrespect of a rebellious teenager, having potty regressions. Everything was hard. Everything. Eating. Bathing. Dressing. Brushing hair. And, those things were just IN the house… Trying to leave the safety of the walls of our small split level rancher took on a whole life of its own….a scary, unpredictable, confusing, and heartbreaking life…filled with grumpiness, meltdowns and getting kicked out of Target for screaming and running. It could have been me that day yelling and trying to run away, but in this case, it was my Ellie. When I see my first baby, who is still trying to figure out her place in this world, acting out or hurting her sweet little friends, it just breaks this mama’s heart.

During these moments, this dry sponge does drip… with streams of hot tears down my face that no one ever sees. My little girl. This loving, compassionate, gorgeous girl, with the darkest, longest eyelashes I have ever seen (short of Younique mascara advertisements), is seemingly wreaking havoc in our lives….everywhere we go.

“It’s just a phase” people say. I am SO tired of that phrase. If life is just full of phases we are just trying to get through, what is life? Are we just surviving this portion until the next “phase” comes? If that is true, we are always missing the current and waiting for the next thing. I want— I NEED — to enjoy things about this “phase” too. I need a new set of eyes. I need a new perspective.

Let’s try this again….

“Mama, I want YOOOOOOOOUUUUUUuuuuuu….” Ellie exclaimed. As exhausted as I was, I said a quick, but tired prayer, to my God, my Lord, my sweet Jesus….”God, give me strength. Thank you for

the blessing of this little life to mold.” And as we snuggled down in her bed, me in my sweats (the only thing that fits me post baby right now) and her in her favorite Frozen footy pj’s, I noticed those lashes again…..those mile long lashes that pour sweetness all over this precious girl’s face. Those lashes, that droop down when she is sad, but lift up to the sky and outline her bright eyes, when she is happily singing an original song or proudly showing me a card she made

for sick Aunt “Mia” (Maria) signed with her telltale “E” with eleven horizontal lines. Those little hands and arms reach out to embrace me, and she says, “Mama, I wuv you sooo much.” All is restored for a moment. My heart knows that even with her struggles and poor choices, that Ellie will be okay. She will be more than okay. She is a princess for Jesus, a daughter of the King. She is “created in His workmanship” and “called by name.”

When I hear her singing “Jesus Loves me” to her dolls or watch her spontaneously praying for people or showing great empathy to all animals and ailing friends and family in her life, I do see God. I see God at work in her growing heart. I see her living up to her Princess calling. My heart smiles when I see her comforting her baby sister Gracie, offering toys she once hid from her in selfishness, and now sharing out of compassion. I know God is at work.

I’ve realized in the past several months of this journey — as exhausting as it is — I am never alone. No, not the “never alone” of a dog and preschooler sharing your bathroom privacy— but the good kind of “never alone.” The BEST kind of “never alone.” The kind that God promises, “I will never leave you, nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6). The kind that says, “in this world, you will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). The kind that says, “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you” (Isaiah 43).

And on this journey, God has given me some pretty amazing people to partner with. He has blessed me with a community group who prays for my husband and me, supporting us as brothers and sisters in Christ, giving us the hope of better days, and helping us to see the amazing blessings in our current lives. He has given me angels on earth in the form of sweet friends, mentors, family, and even passersby. They have all somehow showed me that sometimes in life you are filled up to give, and at other times, you are poured out to be filled by others. They have taught me that life isn’t a bunch of “phases” to muddle through—but is full of joys (small and big) to embrace each

day. I have learned that it is not our home, our possessions, our Pinterest creations, or even

our children who define us, but it is the God Himself that defines us. This God, who speaks

to us in the quiet moments, as well as in the loud ones, loves us mightily…so mightily that He let His own son die for us…so mightily that He even suffers with us now. The mysterious, wonderful reality proclaimed in Isaiah 43 reminds us that we are truly His and He is truly ours….

Amen and Amen:

But now, this is what the Lord says— he who created you, Jacob, he

who formed you, Israel:

1 “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;

I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

2 When you pass through the waters,

I will be with you;

and when you pass through the rivers,

they will not sweep over you.

When you walk through the fire,

you will not be burned;

the flames will not set you ablaze.

3 For I am the Lord your God,

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

I give Egypt for your ransom,

Cush and Seba in your stead.

4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,

and because I love you,

I will give people in exchange for you,

nations in exchange for your life.

5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;

I will bring your children from the east

and gather you from the west.

6 I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’

and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’

Bring my sons from afar

and my daughters from the ends of the earth—

7 everyone who is called by my name,

whom I created for my glory,

whom I formed and made.”

8 Lead out those who have eyes but are blind,

who have ears but are deaf.

9All the nations gather together

and the peoples assemble.

Which of their gods foretold this

and proclaimed to us the former things?

Let them bring in their witnesses to prove they were right,

so that others may hear and say, “It is true.”

10 “You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord,

“and my servant whom I have chosen,

so that you may know and believe me

and understand that I am he.

Before me no god was formed,

nor will there be one after me.

11 I, even I, am the Lord,

and apart from me there is no savior.

12 I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—

I, and not some foreign god among you.

You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, “that I am God.

13 Yes, and from ancient days I am he.

No one can deliver out of my hand.

When I act, who can reverse it?”

14 This is what the Lord says—

your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:

“For your sake I will send to Babylon

and bring down as fugitives all the Babylonians,

in the ships in which they took pride.

15 I am the Lord, your Holy One,

Israel’s Creator, your King.”

16 This is what the Lord says—

he who made a way through the sea,

a path through the mighty waters,

17 who drew out the chariots and horses,

the army and reinforcements together,

and they lay there, never to rise again,

extinguished, snuffed out like a wick:

18 “Forget the former things;

do not dwell on the past.

19 See, I am doing a new thing!

Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the wilderness

and streams in the wasteland.”

Remember, sweet Mama:

You are His and He is Yours. May you run towards Him and away

from the lies of this world. May your days be filled with sweet

smiles of His love and reminders of His grace. May you always

remember that it is Jesus—just JESUS—that defines you. Nothing

else. May you find JOY in the mundane, HOPE in the chaos, and

true LOVE on this journey. He is making a way in the wilderness for

you and bringing forth streams in the dry wasteland.

You are never alone.

I hope this post was encouraging to you! Please share your thoughts with me!

~Julie

Wonderful Wednesday (v. 8-10-16)

It’s Wednesday again! Wow! Ever since I started this blog, it seems like Wednesday rolls around quicker and quicker!

On this particular day, I am writing from the beach where my mom, step dad, husband, twin sister, and three kiddos are vacationing. (Side note, I decided against putting vacationing in quotes, but I am tempted…I mean, is a trip away from home with three littles an actual vacation or just a change of location, as they say?)

Today, I am celebrating the following:

1. My new carrier, the Baby K’tan Active. At the advice of other mamas from my local MOPS group, I purchased this carrier. I LOVE IT! My sweet boy LOVES IT! I can’t even begin to tell you what a lifesaver it has been when I have to be somewhere with all three littles, or even just baby B. It is easy to put on, light weight, and my sweet boy snuggles in it happily. My hands are freed up for other things like cooking, holding my toddler, taking in groceries, carrying beach chairs on this trip, etc. 
2. UVSkinz Sun & Swim Suit My middle baby, Gracie, is a fair-skinned red-headed sweetie. When she even looks outside, she turns pink. I slather sunscreen on her, but she still needs extra protection. In a random internet search one day, I came across this UPF 50+ one-piece outfit made by UV Skinz. There is also a matching reversible sun hat as well, which surprisingly Gracie doesn’t mind wearing! Thanks to my mom (the girl’s Mimi) for purchasing this whole adorable and functional outfit for my sweet girl!
3. Aunts. I am celebrating aunts for a few reasons! The girl’s aunts (my sister and three sister-in-laws) have been such blessings to me! I am packed and here on this vacation because two of my SILs (and one BIL!) helped watch the girls and Baby B on the day we left for the beach. I might still be sorting through my Laundry Mountain at home had I not had their help! Additionally, my sister has been a huge blessing on this trip. She has helped with baby holding, entertaining the girls, making meals, etc., Here she is on a special date with my oldest, Ellie:I also am celebrating my Aunt Cheryl this week! I had a tough crisis of heart/mind surface recently and asked her for advice. She prayed and thought hard about it and wrote me a wise and heart-felt message. As busy as she is and as full as her life is (she is a grandmother now!), she always makes time for me when it counts! Here is a quote from her advice, which was a real blessing to me:
4. Baby Colt! Today, I celebrate the birth of my good friend Barbie’s brand new baby boy, Colt! I have been waiting for this baby and praying for a safe delivery! There are four couples in my community group (including Matt & me). All four got pregnant within a couple of months of each other. All of the summer babies are now born! Three boys (Layton, Benjamin, and Colt) and one girl (Mia). Together, we have 11 kids–6 boys and 5 girls! I am celebrating BABIES today! I am just waiting for my cousin and his wife, Lauren (check out her blog here) to have their summer baby! (Btw, this will be granddaughter #2 for My Aunt Cheryl mentioned above).

So, there you have it! What a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY it is! What are you celebrating today? Please share with me! I would love to hear!

 

~Julie

In Defense of Marriage (or at least the “Love Your Spouse” Challenge Posts)

Every so often, a new challenge circulates on Facebook. Sometimes, it is a cute, simple one such as, “Like my status and I will give you a letter…” or “Drop me one word stating how you know me…” or the ALS ice bucket challenge. Recently, there was the “Love Your Spouse” challenge where people were nominated to post pictures of their relationship journey for seven days. I willingly participated. I mean, hey!, I DO love my spouse and cute pictures of us had to be better than political memes or videos of Trump/Hillary.

Here are some of my pictures:

Adorable, right? Now, when you see my husband and I with our happy smiles, you naturally assume we are perfect and have no marital struggles, right? Wait, you don’t? Neither do I. I see two people who were having a great time at various events. I do see love in the pictures, but I don’t assume a fairytale utopia.

However, this blog is getting just as much circulation as the original challenge. In it, Michiforniagirl.com blogger Melissa challenges the notion of portraying shiny marriages and posts her own seven pictures for the challenge. The pictures are more present-day real life and pretty funny compared to the posed wedding pictures or date night pictures posted by challenge participants. I can relate to a couple of them, especially the “Whose turn is it? (to get the crying baby) and “Occasional Single-Married Parent” scenes. Her point is that marriage is hard and not representative in the pictures people choose to present.

True, true. Marriage IS hard. People DO show their highlight reels in their statuses, but to me, that isn’t the point. The point is to reflect on your relationship, which I did. And you know? Those pictures reminded me of a time that was simpler…our falling in love stage. Do we have all-day dates like my Sunday in the Country pose or my Rocks State Park hike picture? No, unfortunately, those days are few and far between right now. But, posting those pictures doesn’t equate to me saying my marriage is perfect. To me, I posted pictures to remind myself of the man I fell in love with–the man I am STILL in love with–the man, who like me, ISN’T perfect, but is perfect for me. He is the one I vowed before loved ones and God Himself to stay committed to “for better or worse.”

So, even though I don’t post many pictures showing our less-than-glamourous days, I am not in denial that the ordinary days occur. Or the ordinary and annoying days! Or the ordinary and annoying and “he/she doesn’t understand XYZ” days. They do. And my smile doesn’t mean they don’t. I am just choosing to share joyful moments that were captured in time. And you know what? They draw me closer to my husband.

Can you imagine if all our posts or even pictures for this challenge were negative? What if Matt posted the following about me?: “I came home to a messy kitchen…again” Or “The person I married was a few sizes smaller than my current post-baby wife” Or “We had the same casserole for the past four nights.” Wow-so inspiring, right?  While those thoughts may be true, they focus on the negative.

Instead, and because he isn’t a Facebook poster generally, he verbally tells me the following: “You are Super Mommy!” Or “Mommy is the best cook ever” and “You are beautiful.” These positive (and true to him) comments both inspire me and model what is good to my children. They also focus Matt’s mind on his commitment to me.

In the book of Philippians, the apostle Paul writes, “And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” To me, positive posts, including smiling spouse pictures in the Love Your Spouse challenge help me to focus on what is honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable. And you know, even if the pictures aren’t true for every day, they are reminders of the good. And, the good is great to me.

When I see you in person and ask how you are doing, please share your deleted scenes with me. Ask me to pray for the hard times. I need your advice and prayers as well. But, as far as the Facebook Love Your Spouse challenge? I applaud your shiny relationship photos. I applaud your happy family pictures. I applaud your smiling selfies. And if they are just your highlight reel, so be it. Thank you for reminding us–for reminding me–of love.

 

~Julie

 

 

 

WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY (v. 8-3-16)

I almost forgot!! Today is Wednesday, which means it is time to CELEBRATE!! Here is what I am celebrating today:

1. My mom is officially retired as a nurse! 45 years of caring for patients! Amazing!! What hard work and sacrifice!! I can’t wait to honor her soon on our trip to the beach!
2. Baby B gained over a pound in two weeks! Hungry Boy had a weight check today and is now 9.45 lbs! Plus, he has given me two nights of 5-hour sleep stretches! Keep it up, Buddy! 
3. Movies and popcorn. I really don’t need to elaborate on this one, do I? It is summer vacation. My big girl is super energetic and Mama is super tired right now (even with 1.5 hours of extra sleep the past two nights!). But, as energetic as she is, she loves a good movie and some yummy popcorn! Win, win for all! This afternoon, we are watching the old classic–The Wizard of Oz.
4. A trip to Walmart. My step dad offered to help me get ready for the beach, so I invited him to come play with the girls yesterday evening, so I could run errands. I went to Walmart with just the baby! It felt so weird with just one kiddo. I must have stopped myself from my normal “1,2,3” counting kids several times. It is funny how fast life changes. My time with just baby in Walmart was actually semi-therapeutic. Not as therapeutic as it could have been, because I was very aware of not wanting to shop too long and Hungry Boy can only go so long before he needs to eat again (I will add, even with a full tummy after a parking lot feed, he still cried the ENTIRE way home from the store…not a fan of the car seat, that’s for sure!).
5. Leftovers. Again, need I say more? We have some yummy leftovers in the fridge, so there will be no thinking, defrosting, chopping, and cooking for me tonight! I will just enjoy opening the fridge, taking some yummy summer dishes out, and heating them up!

 

What are you celebrating today? I would love to hear!

~Julie

Welcome, Baby Benjamin!

Baby Benjamin is four weeks old today, but I wanted to share his wonderful newborn photos with you! We had a photo session when he was six days old with Jennifer DiDio. She not only got some great shots of him, which I will feature below, but she did a special session of my girls featured here.

The wonderful thing about Jennifer is that she is not only an exceptional photographer, but she is an inspirational mentor, friend, and sister in Christ. My husband and I spent three years with other newly married couples under the teaching of Jennifer and her husband, Chris. We learned a lot about marriage, each other, and life in general; but were able to glean some awesome parenting skills watching the DiDios interact with their sons.

Jennifer is the perfect example of a Titus 2 woman. Check out the Apostle Paul’s advice to Titus in these verses: ³ Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers. Instead, they should teach others what is good. ⁴ These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, ⁵ to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.

Taking into account what kind of amazing woman Jennifer is, you will understand why her words in the blog about Benjamin’s arrival were so encouraging to me! They were just what I needed to read on a crazy day as a Meandering Mama. Take a look here to see the pictures.

Have you ever been in a marriage group or a mentoring relationship? Tell me about it!

~Julie